I almost didn’t write this week’s post. I don’t like writing about negative things too often, I like to keep my blog on the upbeat side if I can. That’s not always real life though, is it. This week hasn’t been great, to be honest, and try as I might I just couldn’t turn it around. This week’s word is tension.

I don’t want to write a cryptic post but at the same time, I can’t write about specifics. As in everyone’s life, there are undercurrents, unsettling things and worries. I choose not to blog about those things because I refuse to dwell. I’m a strong person, I’ve been through an awful lot in my life. I usually put on a smile, pull my socks up and take on head-first whatever life throws in my direction. Not this week though, I just couldn’t.

I let worries win, I wallowed in self-pity and I caused an awful lot of tension with my thunderous mood. There has been tension both inside and outside of the home. After a few days of feeling utterly rotten, I decided enough was enough. I had to talk about how I was feeling so that’s what I did. I was totally honest and when people asked if I was okay I said Actually I’m not, it was such a relief. I’m an expert at making it look like I have it all together. I sometimes forget that it’s okay not to have it all together all the time.

The tension is slowly dissipating, I’m ready to face the battles once more with a steady and determined smile on my face.